"Sometimes very briefly, a blank moment - a kind of numbness - which is not a moment of forgetfulness.  This terrifies me."  Roland Barthes

I have these moments.
I want to deny them, push them away, pretend I don't have them
yet there they are.
I pray to have the strength to not deny anything,
darkness, numbness, light, sorrow.
to just take it all, give it my hand, as you gave me yours,
faithfully.
I have a broken heart, may all the broken parts mend together.
I pray for your eternal soul to remain ever with me, ever constant,
forever and ever.
Amen