"A fresh attitude starts to happen when we look to see that yesterday was yesterday, and now it is gone; today is today and now it is new. It is like that - every hour, every minute, it is changing.  If we stop observing change, then we stop seeing everything as new."   Dzigar Kongtrul Rinpoche

I pray to go through my frustration and anger that things change, that life is impermanent.
I can't stand that fact. and I fight it every step of the way.
I pray to allow anger and frustration to emerge, to not stand it its way, to give it its life and allow it when it's ready to change and transform,
it might not happen this minute, this day, or even this year, I pray to bow before every unliberated, ungood feeling I have with reverence for all life even the messy parts.

I pray for your liberated soul, changing and beautiful to stay in my orbit, to watch over me, and guide me through this life and beyond.

Amen, amen amen....

This morning I pray to be released from the responsiblility I feel that I did something wrong, so wrong.
I go over the day it happened. and it's all a bad dream.
I pray to forgive.
I pray to learn how to live now
in a world I don't like anymore.
I pray to be grateful for the world
despite your absence.
I pray to believe in the next world.
I pray for your soul.

Amen.

"Last Night as I was Sleeping"  Antonio Machado

Last night as I was sleeping I dreamt !
marvelous error !
that I had a beehive here inside my heart
And the golden bees were making white combs
and sweet honey
from my old failures."


There's no leaning on you anymore to get me out of this,
just as you have a pattern of life
there is a pattern to life for me too.
letting go means moving, not on, not forward, just moving in the pattern of life.
And "being generous enough to allow change in my life."
I pray to be brave enough to allow change in my life.
I pray for your soul. always.
and every day.

Amen

"Don't surrender your loneliness
 so quickly
 let it cut more deep."  Hafiz


     I pray for your soul
     to not be lonely
     to know our love for you
     in the soul world
     I pray to know loneliness
     and not run from it.
     
Amen

"I no longer desire what I used to desire.  I must wait - supposing that such a thing could happen, for a new desire to form."  Roland Barthes

I don't know what my desires are, they all relate to the past, and I can not change it.
I have to find a "new path to the waterfall."
I pray to be guided to find that way and to walk it.
I pray for your soul to be at peace, forgetting all earthly cares.
Amen.

I am loving you every minute, as I loved you here on earth, love doesn't change.

I am never far from you,
my heart is always with you.
your immortal heart is here with me.
I will find you,
we will find each other
in the heavens and the galaxies, or the planets beyond this one,
my soul will travel to yours.

"I tell you the truth, you will weep and mourn while the world rejoices. You will grieve, but your grief will turn to joy."   John 16:20

Into this river of life, endless tears flow
Life is everlasting,
 I pray.
I will someday swim into the great ocean
to join you there.
I pray to do what needs to be done, until that moment comes.

Saint Therese of Lisieux
Living on Love is sailing unceasingly
sowing peace and joy in every heart.
Beloved Pilot, charity impels me,
for I see you in my sister souls.
In its brightness I sail straight ahead
I've my motto written on my sails.
"Living on Love"

I will live on your love,
my eternal sailor,
my devoted sailor, beloved sailor.
I pray for your guidance to help me steer my sails
and that you may keep me in the harbor of your love.


"Living on Love is banishing every fear.
Every memory of past faults.
I see no imprint of my sins.
In a moment love has burned everything."

"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, loving someone deeply gives you courage."  Lao Tzu

My teachers are Lao Tzu, Jesus, Buddha, St. Theresa of Avila,
and your beloved St. Francis of Assisi.
Humbly I read their words. take them in, and pray to know their wisdom.
Your loving hands still guide me, your heart carries mine.
I pray each day for your eternal bright loving soul.
and I pray to find you again when the world above calls me.

Amen.

I am of the nature to grow old.
There is no way to escape growing old.
I am of the nature to have ill-health.
There is no way to escape having ill-health.
I am of the nature to die.
There is no way to escape death.
All that is dear to me and everyone I love
are of the nature to change.
There is no way to escape being separated from them.
My actions are my only true belongings.
I cannot escape the consequences of my actions.
My actions are the ground on which I stand.
buddha

        I pray to live right action.
        to accept my weaknesses,
        and forgive myself for all my shadows.
        I pray to accept change when I cannot
        I pray to give up on the past,
        to send it up to the clouds and let it all drift away.

          I pray for your guidance and your love to shelter me always.
          I pray for you, my most humble teacher.

           When Warren Buffett was interviewed and asked what is the most important advice you ever got?
            He replied, "My mother and father taught me how to love."

            Thank you for teaching me how to love, my most precious gift,
             a gift for eternity.

"When I count my blessings, I count you twice."  Irish saying

 I left in the golden hour
 the air felt golden, the afternoon October light was on everything I passed,
 a loving light.
 the earth felt golden.

 I don't ask God why you are gone.
 as you would say, "why do people blame God,"
 we all must die.
 our bodies were created to live and to die.

   I still ask every day,
   where are you now?
   how can I see you again?
   how can I get in touch with you?
   I pray for an answer.

    Amen.
 

As you leave this place
may the Living Lord go with you;
May he go behind you, to encourage you,
beside you, to befriend you,
above you, to watch over you,
beneath you, to lift you from your sorrows,
within you, to give you the gifts of faith, hope, and love,
and always before you, to show you the way.
benediction - blair monie

You will always be in my world.
I will find a way for the unseen and the unspoken, the unheard and the unknown
to have a place.
When the earth stops
and the moon doesn't dream
and the sun goes home
the eternal world I will live in
will always have you.

 I pray for this, and I pray and pray.

 Amen.

"He has reached the end of the way:
 He has crossed the river of life.
 All that he had to do is done:
 He has become one with all life."  The Dhammapada

   "Cross the river bravely."
   You crossed the river of life bravely,
   and I know all that you had to do is done,
   I pray to accept that and to have faith that you have become one with all life,
   as someday I will.
   I pray to cross the river bravely,
   and do all that I have to do.

   Amen

The Day Sky
"Let us be like
Two falling stars in the day sky.
 Let no one know of our sublime beauty
As we hold hands with God
And burn
 Into a sacred existence that defies -
That surpasses
Every description of ecstasy
And love."   Hafiz


It's getting harder and I don't know why.
I pray to not ask why.
Nothing seems to ease it.
I know  my mind can not understand.
Let me give up trying.
I pray for strength, fortitude and faith.
The faith of everyday, getting up and surrendering to what I can not understand.
Amen.

"Let nothing disturb you.
 Let nothing frighten you.
 All things pass away.
 God never changes.
 Patience obtains all things.
 He who has God lacks for nothing.
 God alone suffices."   Teresa of Avila

I am in your sky. you are in mine.
Wherever the winds take you I am there.
Wherever the clouds move you, I am there.
I am in your heart, the boundless heart of your soul.
The Divine is in me and in you.
We are one, part of each other eternally,
world without end. Amen

Several Times in the Last Week
Ever since Happiness heard your name
It has been running through the streets
Trying to find you.

And several times in the last week,
God Himself has even come to my door-
Asking me for your address!

Once I said,
“God,
I thought You knew everything.
Why are You asking me
Where Your lovers live?”

And the Beloved replied,

Indeed, Hafiz, I do know Everything –
But it is fun playing dumb once in a while.
And I love intimate chat
And the warmth of your heart’s fire.

Maybe we should make this poem into a song-
I think it has potential!

How far does this refrain sound,
For I know it is a Truth:

Ever since Happiness heard your name,
It has been running through the streets
Trying to find you.
And several times in the last week,
God Himself has come to my door-
So sweetly asking for your address,
Wanting the beautiful warmth of your heart’s fire.


October 9th

I pray for God to keep you in everlasting peace,

Amen

Oct 10th
I dreamt of you last night
I don't know how it was when you left.
by what means you were carried away,
what hands reached out for yours,
what souls smiled as they greeted you.
I know you didn't want to go.
I know you love us all
and we will carry your love with us always,
there is a golden thread of love
stitched from my soul to yours.

Oct. 11th
I'm confused about so many things
how to go on? how to move forward?
To not make your leaving an excuse to not live.
You would scold me for that.
and yet I know you would understand.
reach your arms out to me
put my head on your chest
and make it all better.
I am still a child.
maybe I always will be.
I don't want to hold you back,
I don't want to keep you from your destiny,
yet, I want you to be near always.
I pray for the counsel, the wisdom, the fortitude to walk the path of life
from moment to moment, and not let fear paralyze me.

I bow my head in prayer, a humble servant to the Divine.

Amen.

"Just as we are all born at the perfect moment for our energy to enter this earth, there is a perfect moment for us to leave this earth."  Sogyal Rinpoche

I pray to trust in all that I cannot See.
I pray to believe in what I cannot know with my Mind
I pray for your spirit and soul to travel  far and wide to places I cannot imagine,
and I pray that your travels will  always keep you close to me.

Amen

  When I look for you out there, I don't find you.
       It is only when I look inward, you are with me.

      I pray for peace, for you, for me, for everyone.
      I pray for faith, for what I can't see.
      I pray that those of us left here on earth, cherish each other, as you cherished us.
     
      Amen

Stuck Prayer


I pray for nothing.
you, are always my prayer.

"Each of us has his own rhythm of suffering."  Roland Barthes

I pray to honor the rhythm of suffering, to not make myself "wrong."

I pray to the Divine to open my heart to myself, and to everyone I meet, everyone I love and cherish.
I atone for errors I made, they are in the past.

I pray to stay on the path toward light, the path to becoming a loving, forgiving person.
 
And always I pray for you living in eternal life.

Amen.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time; enjoying one moment at a time;
accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
taking, as He did this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will; that I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him forever in the next. 
Amen

"The best way to be hopeful is to do hopeful things."  Daniel Berrigan


With life and love beside me,
I follow the order of the day.
Live this day, let go of past misdeeds, past mistakes.
I cherish your love and commitment to life,
how can I do anything except follow your guidance.
With this I pray to the Divine, keep me steady on my path.

Amen.

"The desires I had before her death ( while she was sick) can no longer be fulfilled, for that would mean it is her death that allows me to fulfill them- her death might be a liberation in some sense with regard to my desires.  But her death has changed me, I no longer desire what I used to desire.  I must wait - supposing that such a thing could happen - for a  new desire to form, a desire following her death." Roland Barthes

 I throw out all the past desires.
 they don't make sense.
 I pray for this new beginning to honor you,
 your love for me,
 my love for you,
 in all that I say and do and think and all that I am, I pray for this.

 "Let yourself be inert, wait till the incomprehensible power... that has broken you restores you a little, I say a little, for henceforth you will always keep something broken about you.  Tell yourself this, too, for it is a kind of pleasure to know that you will never love less, that you will never be consoled, that you will constantly remember more and more."
    Letter from Proust to George de Lauris, whose mother has just died.  ( from Roland Barthes)

  I pray to take these broken words, these broken prayers and make something of them, something not whole, something pieced together
  into light.


   

November 10th
"People tell you to keep your "courage" up. But the time for courage was when she was sick, when I took care of her and saw her suffering, her sadness, and when I had to conceal my tears. Constantly one had to make a decision, put on a mask, and that was courage. 
- Now courage means the will the live and there's all too much of that."
  Roland Barthes

Now I ask for courage
from the Divine, the Beloved
from you.
It's all a dream,
me here, you somewhere else,
when I feel as though you are still among us.
I pray for new courage, new strength, new wisdom.

Amen.

Sunday Haiku
 old decaying tree,
 new growth with leaves and branches
 all at once I live.

Dream Fable

"Your prayers are your light
 Your devotion is your strength
 Sleep is the enemy of both

 Your life is the only opportunity that life can give you
 If you ignore it, if you waste it
 You will only turn to dust."   Rabia

Dream Fable 2
"In my dream I was going in the wrong direction, I knew it, yet went despite my knowing.
After traveling a short distance, I wanted to head home.
All the people waiting to go back said you have to wait a long time.
Someone appeared and said, "all my blessings are good, anything is possible."  

I pray to know my way and to head home.
I pray to know that all my blessings are good.
and anything is possible.

I pray for you, my beloved.
I pray for your safe journey out in the beyond.
I pray to live my life and head home.

Amen.

"All my blessing are good. Anything is possible."  from my dream last night, an angel said  to me.
 
I pray to appreciate all my blessings.
I pray to live through this and to go on
until life on earth ends and you come to collect me.

Amen.